FaMilY PoTrAit..???!

here it goes.... i came from a rich family when i was born.. me n my family..always went to eat those expensive food..n every week surely go hotel eat buffet.. isn't tht great? but till year 2000.. my family started had financial problems... so hear cames those quarrels... nagging... etc. till now year 2005,is the worst year of my life! such a disaster.. this family ruined...?? i don't get a proper education compared to my friends.. Actually i had a study insurance in s'pore..n could only used it if i study in s'pore.. i had $10k..s'pore.. for education..,but end of last year.. my dad withdraw it.. and gambled it up.. Thanks to him..,now i got no money to further my education.. he even withdraw my bro's studies insurance too. great rite??! hmmp!! now my mum asked me to work.. she said ..i'm a lady.. no need to get high education... coz.. as a lady.. no matter how surely gonna marry n be a housewife.. haiiz.. but frm the point of view of mine..,thts wrong! this is a modern world... no matter u're a lady or man.. u should study.. n get a skill 1st.. then work.. now.. my dad didn't support the family dy.. guess wat? actually he have 3 wives included my mum.. mum was the 3rd. OMG! he got 4 children in s'pore.. all workin dy.. with high education n good salary.. their age around 30 plus dy. wat a big gap between me n my sibblings.
hmmm.. tell u a secret laa.. shhhHH.. its private n confidential.. no1 knows except me n sibblings. my mum got a bf lehh.. since when i'm in National service.. actually i don't know till when Chinese new year i wana come back home..,my mum told me. tht man.. promised to support my studies.. but he cakap besar!! hate lar!! if not i already going to taylor's college study dy.. "geramji" !!! but listen.. the conflict began between my parents its not connected with the man,k. haiiz.. i dare not tell any1 about this.. scared people look down on me.. i cant take it! now im getting weaker n weaker.. always got financial problem.. The man rite..,he gave me n my sibblings rm100 every month..our allowance. n every months he pay for my scooter installment rm260.. but this month i guess no.. ( guess he's broke ) n coz jz now my mum ask me whether how much is my salary.. she asked me to use my salary n pay the scooter installment.. huh??! hah??!! my july salary..is only around rm200plus.. n im gonna get it very late..,coz it comes by cheque.. i owe my nanny rm350.. i owe my college rm165..,i've to pay my college by this week.. n i havent.. i don't have money..my money only enough for my daily life..example.. eat. how am i gonna find that large amount??!! haiiz.. so sad.. my life's so miserable.. chaos!! i had gone through alotz rintangan even now.. tears always flow.. sometimes i tahan.. n i telan my saliva.. with great sadness inside.. heartache... hope god knows.... now.. praying hard to get my ptptn loan..,so i can get a proper education.. no jokes! actually,my work sometimes is kinda tiring..i admit tht.. feel like wana quit by this month.. but i bare it.. i need money.. so i plan to work another month or 2months.. hhuhh... now.. the only person who always brighten up my day..was my hubby syahreez.. although i didn't completely tell him much about my family problem..,its not that i don't want to tell.. its i don't know how to express..when i express..i surely gonna cry. ( the fact is.. scared people thinks differently on me.. ) hmm.. he's the one..my hubby.. who brighten up my day.. when i msg him or talk to him or hang out with him.. i feel so happy.. n seems like no problems sticking with me.. really glad he's always by my side. thanks! muakss u!